Author Archives: A Life After Loss

About A Life After Loss

I lost my son in 2013. I lost a lot that day, but I never lost it all. I still have hope, albeit it wavers sometimes. I still have my love of writing, and I still have my humor. Let's learn how to do this grief thing right.

Vaccuum

One of the scary side effects of PTSD is having these “trigger moments” that will destroy your day, week, month. Last night’s trigger moment: Watching Interstellar. I’m not going to spoil it for you if you haven’t seen it, but if you’ve … Continue reading

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The Great Wean Of 2015

I walked up to the nursing station in the pediatric ICU and leaned against the counter. The nurse peered over her computer monitor at me. “I need to use a breast pump,” I said. This was probably the third time … Continue reading

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Happy Thanksgiving

Jay used to wake up at 6am on the dot every morning. I would bring him into bed with us to nurse and catch another 5-10 minutes of sleep. I always hoped he would nurse and then fall asleep for awhile … Continue reading

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108 Saturdays

107 Saturdays ago, I was at my mom’s house. I was tired. I was semi looking forward to going back home already. It was lunchtime. I listened to my daughter play in the living room with my husband while I … Continue reading

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Finding a Good Weaver

For your first pregnancy, I highly recommend getting pregnant at the exact same time as one of your very best friends in the world. Nothing is better than becoming a mother with someone who knew you from before your entire … Continue reading

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The Real Ever After

It’s been almost 2 years since my son died. We have a 9 month old baby. My daughter has started Kindergarten. I feel like this is the image people see that are on the outskirts of my life. I hate … Continue reading

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A Repeat of Love

A friend recently pointed me to another blog written by a woman who lost a child. The blog discussed the weird questions you field when you’re pregnant again after experiencing that loss. Well-meaning folks want to make sure you aren’t … Continue reading

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Mama

I went down to my mom’s a couple of weeks ago. This wasn’t a normal visit. My mom’s cancer was getting the better of her and she was about to go on hospice. She took one last chemo treatment just … Continue reading

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Letters

When we had Floyd, many friends sent heartfelt baby gifts before and right after his arrival. These gifts were particularly meaningful because all of these well-wishers knew what we had gone through. Each package that arrived in the mail came … Continue reading

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Better

A few months after Jay died, people started asking me if things were better. If they were too nervous to ask me, they asked our friends. The answer I and everyone else gave was no. I hoped that after a … Continue reading

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